ONCE UPON A YOUNGER DAY, I was asked to perform the wedding ceremony of the daughter/sister of friends. The bride and I had grown up in the same congregation, so I assumed she preferred a church-type wedding. I was honored to be a part of my friends’ celebration!
But as I spoke to her over the phone, I was stunned when she blurted, “We don’t want any of the God stuff in the ceremony.”
After letting that sink in, I was able to stammer, “No prayer or Bible references? Because, marriage is all about . . .” she interrupted with, “No.”
I asked what she wanted me to talk about. She replied, “Read a nice poem about forever love and happiness. Or . . . can’t you just say a few things about love and then pronounce us married?”
I was totally unprepared for this. Perhaps I should have told her I would think about it—especially considering my closeness to the family. Maybe I should have worked with her, at least met her groom-to-be since she made the effort to reach out to me.
I don’t remember many details of the call. I kept hoping the right words would come out of my mouth. They didn’t. I judged her and her groom that day. I told her how much I regretted that I was probably not the right choice for their ceremony—perhaps a Justice of the Peace?
Minister friends have attempted to comfort me over time, (“You did the right thing.”)
Did I?
How easy it was to judge! Too easy it was for ME to exclude God, by not seeking His counsel. I was quick to pounce on their decision—the topic was really irrelevant. I attempted to justify my action using God. Looking at it another way, I missed a basic law of love. I’d failed at doing for my friend as I would want them to do for me. Ouch!
He could have chosen to, but God didn’t treat me the way I treated her, and it changed me. Long after the fact, one day I visited a passage I had read often. But this time my friend came to mind. I wondered who did the ceremony and about their life together.
I sat in sadness and shook my head as I ruminated about what I’d done. Now decades away from that day, I asked God to be the Lord of my past. As I relived the scene, I wondered to God what I should do going forward.
The reply from His Word seems to me to be the middle of Jesus' heart. I share it here and now in hopes that it may help someone else as much as it did me—maybe today you need to hear it too.
Right after warning us all not to judge, and the consequences of it, Jesus, (Luke 6:38) revealed a sin remedy for people like me. I can tell you it’s a humbling, rewarding, and freeing exercise:
“Give away your life; you’ll find life given back, but not merely given back—given back
with bonus and blessing.
Giving, not getting, is the way. Generosity begets generosity.”
© Copyright 2017, 2022 Gary Landerfelt MyPericope.com
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